Married? Single? We are the Temple of God (2)

Life after Pentecost (V)

1 Corinthians 7

After discussing the role of our bodies in the worship of our Lord Jesus Christ, Paul moves on in the next 9 chapters (chapters 7-15) to the questions the church of Corinth asked. He has received news about things that are of great concern for them. Let us start with Chapter 7, which deals with the married/single issues.

Do we need to be married? Do we have to stay single?

Whether you are married or single, today’s message is for you.

Whether you are married or single, Paul is interested to see that you (or the church of Corinth) understand that your bodies belong to God. Whatever condition we live in, our bodies should Glorify God.

A recent study tells that the number of unmarried couples in the US living together has increased from 523,000 in 1970 to 4,236,000 in 1998. Most likely, we have larger numbers in 2007. In Europe, numbers are much higher.

The National Center for Mental Health study revealed that women who live with men without being married experience depression four times more than married women, and two times more than single women.

However, divorce rate is high- 50% within married couples. Married couples are facing serious problems in living together in marriage.

What is going on?

In Newsweek magazine there was an article lately entitled “The Price of Marriage.” Brides are spending so much money on their weddings and losing their minds. Newsweek’s point was that we live in consumerist society. People think if they spent more money on the wedding day, their marriage will be happier. Unfortunately, hours of planning for the wedding, zero hours for planning for the marriage.

Let us examine Paul’s view of marriage.

We need to understand that Paul is not against marriage. Paul writes in detail about marriage in Ephesians 5:22-33. He compares marital love with the love of Christ for his church. Paul is definitely not against marriage.

We need to understand where Paul stands at that time, around 55 AD.

For Singles:

Paul prefers Christians to stay single because of the situation they live in. What is the situation? “Because of the present crisis, I think that it is good for you to remain as you are.”(7:26)

This is for those who are not married. There is a “present crisis.” There is no time for marriage. Life is short. (7:29) Christians are under persecution.

In addition, we know that the Lord is coming soon. So for Paul the important issue is to spread the Christian testimony all over. If someone is married, there will be family responsibilities. He encourages celibacy. He says, “I say this as a concession, not as a command. I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God..” (7:6,7)

We have to be careful not to arrive to conclusions without studying the context of the passage. If someone chooses to remain unmarried, that is great. Yet, one has to be faithful in keeping that. We keep reading and hearing in the news about religious leaders who made the choice of celibacy, yet are involved in the worst kind of sexual immorality. Being single is a gift. If you do not have self-control, you do not have the gift of celibacy (v.9,36).

I know a man who made the choice of celibacy with prayer. He dedicated his life to take care of the unwanted, poor, and left out children. He invested his time, money, and all he has in this ministry. Now he has more than 150 young men whose lives were touched by him. Many of them are married and have respectful families. He is like a father to them.

For singles, Paul is advising; do not marry a person who will hinder your Christian growth. In one word, do not marry a non-Christian. It is better to remain single than marrying for the wrong motives.

For Married Couples:

Christians in Corinth were surrounded by sexual immorality. The city had a reputation even among pagans. Paul is giving instructions about sex and marriage. Some Christians within the church were teaching that even married couples should not have sex. Others were teaching that married partners should leave their husband or wife if they were not Christians. Paul is against all these wrong teachings.

- Paul is not describing that marriage is just for physical intimacy. No, if you want to know more about the Christian understanding of marriage, read Ephesians 5. Church of Corinth was facing sexual immorality. Paul’s advice is that physical intimacy is good; it is from God, it is not a sin provided it is kept within the marriage. In fact, he encourages couples to give time to each other in physical intimacy:

“Each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband. ³The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. ⁴The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife.” (3,4)

It disturbing to see that the media distorts the image of marriage. Numbers and statistics indicate that our society does not understand what it means to be married, to be a couple. In how many TV shows can you find that married couples are happy together? The Cosby Show? Home Improvement?

On the other hand thousands of shows like Friends, Sex in the City, Grey’s Anatomy, Desperate Housewives, and more always make fun of married couples, or can not find marriage to be practical. “Fun” is always outside marriage.

This text is dealing with the issue of sexual purity: sexuality in marriage. Yet, please this passage is not teaching to go and grab a husband or wife in order to control your sexual desires. Marriage is much more than sex. Marriage is commitment and one has to read the entire Bible to come to conclusions, specially one has to read about agape in 1 Corinthians 13, in 1, 2, 3 John, in Ephesians 5 and more.

Once a married couple was facing some financial problems. The husband asked his boss for a raise and he received it the next day because he deserved it. He was impatient to inform his wife that night.

In the evening when he arrived home, he rushed into the house and shouted: “Honey, I’ve got the raise!”

He found the house prepared for a nice meal, with candles and nice music.

His wife came from kitchen with a smile. She sat at the table where her husband was already sitting and put a note that read, “Honey, I knew you would get the raise. All the little things I have done tonight for you is to say how much I love you.”

While the wife was going back to kitchen, another note fell from her pocket. The husband picked up the note and found the following very interesting reading, “Honey, I’m sorry you didn’t get the raise... all the little things I have done tonight for you is to say how much I love you.”

Our marriage is not built on business contracts. Paul talks about this kind of love in Chapter 13 of 1^st Corinthians. Paul is interested in purity of physical intimacy. In Chapter 6, he spoke about our bodies being the temple of God.

In verses 12 and on he speaks further about married couples who have a non-Christian partner to stay as they are and not divorce. For widows he had further instructions. Over all one can find that he is asking all the different groups of the church, married, unmarried, widowed, or ones who are thinking to divorce, to practice purity in their life, which means to be close to Jesus Christ.

Let us read Paul’s “instructions manual” which was written for them and for us today. Let us obey the Lord.

Amen